When George McClellan met Ellen Marcy he fell head over heels in love. He immediately wrote a letter to Ellen’s mother stating his intentions. He confessed he had decided to “make a bold plunge” and even though he hadn’t seen a great deal of his dazzling intended, that little had been sufficient. He would win her if he could, and he believed surely, that he could. Up until then he had been only a soldier concerned with nothing but his career, but seeing Ellen had changed all that. 

He forewarned Mrs. Marcy that he was about to storm the redoubt. If she had any objections, she should state them now since Capt. Marcy was on the frontier. Now that he had shown his flag, it remained only for her to give her permission for him to “carry on the war as best I may.” He had no doubt that he would win this skirmish and that Miss Nelly would soon be his. 

George McClellan was never known for modesty. In fact during the upcoming war, many considered him pompous, ego centered, the Little Napoleon, and the only officer who could strut while being seated. This was perhaps the one time in his life when he misjudged the battle and suffered from severe overconfidence. For the rest of his military career he would see an imaginary enemy that he believed outnumbered him and he would suffer from what Lincoln would call, “the slows.” 

Since Mary Marcy shared her husband’s high opinion of McClellan, she granted her permission. Her husband wrote from the frontier that he was delighted McClellan was so pleased “with my dear Nelly. “ He hoped she would like him as much, for he was talented, good looking, and agreeable.” Mr. Marcy could not conceive that Ellen would not fall immediately in love with McClellan. He was everything the Marcy’s hoped for. They loved him very much. 

Unfortunately, their daughter didn’t. After a very short courtship, less than 2 months, he popped the question and to her parent’s utter horror, she turned him down. McClellan was unaccustomed to failing at anything, and that he should lose the only woman he’d ever loved was unthinkable.

He was still reeling when he was sent to Pensacola Florida for temporary duty. He now shifted to the only strategy left to him. He began courting her mother through a letter writing campaign. At least Mrs. Marcy was a sympathetic back door to his intended target and a co-mourner with whom he could share his anguish. 

“I succeeded in making a very great blunder and doing a very foolish thing in the way of pushing too far and too quickly.” He feared he had blown his chances and would regret it forever. But he would not give up. He would try to undo the unfavorable impression he had made. In his many letters to Mrs. Marcy he kicked himself again and again but vowed to wait as long “as there was a shadow of hope.” 

It promised to be a long wait. Miss Nelly would not give McClellan the time of day—no encouragement of any kind. She simply didn’t love him and no matter how much Daddy liked him, she wasn’t going to marry him. 

By the following spring he was coming to the conclusion that there was no hope. The only good effect “in giving my vanity so good a lesson.” He would soon leave for faraway places which he mused would “be a relief to the young lady that I will soon be out of the way.”*

 Stay tuned for the next episode: Enter A. P. Hill

*From “The Class of 1846: From West Point to Appomatax” by John Waugh (highly recommended!)